Helping Older Parents Articles

Wondering whether you should worry? Having trouble getting parents to accept help? Overwhelmed by challenges and concerns?

This part of the site is especially for you! It includes our hand-picked articles, tips, & resources for people helping older parents.

Is Your Aging Parent OK?
What to check & how to talk about it

by Leslie Kernisan, MD MPH 5 Comments

Have you been getting worried about your aging parent, or wondering if they are ok continuing to live as they are?

Maybe they’ve been mostly okay but now you’re spotting some problems with memory, such as forgetfulness or asking the same questions repeatedly. Or maybe you’ve noticed trouble with driving, keeping up the house, managing stairs, or paying bills.

Some aging parents simply begin to seem more withdrawn. Others start leveling accusations at others, claiming someone took or moved something, or acting paranoid.

When families notice these types of changes, it’s often really hard to know what to do next. How do you know if they really need help or not, and what kind of help to get? And what do you do if they refuse to discuss it, or get mad when you bring it up?

Since this is such a common dilemma for families, I’ve recorded a video, explaining exactly what you can do, if you’ve noticed some worrisome changes in your parent and are trying to figure out what to do next. Here’s how to know if your aging parent needs help, and how to talk to them about your concerns.

This video covers: [Read more…]

8 Great Gift Ideas for Older Adults & Family Caregivers

by Leslie Kernisan, MD MPH 14 Comments

It’s getting to be that time of the year: the season when many of us start looking for a thoughtful gift to give to an older loved one.

I’ll be honest: I’m not much of a shopper and it’s not my style to give physical gifts just for the sake of doing so.

But I do think it can be wonderful to give something that brightens a person’s day.

And it’s even better when a gift is practical, useful, or otherwise helps an older person make the best out of life.

One of my favorite resources, when it comes to identifying useful items to help with age-related challenges or caregiving, are the lists put together by DailyCaring.com.

They have a great list of 50 top gift ideas for seniors, and another terrific list of gifts related to Alzheimer’s and dementia.

In this article, I’ll share my list of eight gifts that can help older adults cope with common late-life challenges.

Four are for older adults in general, and then four are especially useful for those living with Alzheimer’s or a related dementia.

Four great gift ideas for older adults:

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How to Evaluate, Prevent & Manage Constipation in Aging

by Leslie Kernisan, MD MPH 211 Comments

Constipation is not a glamorous topic, but it’s certainly important, especially in older adults.

As anyone who has experienced occasional — or even chronic — constipation can tell you, it can really put a damper on quality of life and well-being.

Constipation can also cause more substantial problems, such as:

Severe abdominal pain, which can lead to emergency room visits
Hemorrhoids, which can bleed or be painful
Increased irritability, agitation, or even aggression, in people with Alzheimer’s disease or other forms of dementia
Stress and/or pain that can contribute to delirium (a state of new or worse confusion that often happens when older adults are hospitalized)
Fecal incontinence, which can be caused or worsened by having a hard lump of stool lodged in the lower bowel
Avoidance of needed pain medication, due to fear of constipation

Fortunately, it’s usually possible to help older adults effectively manage and prevent constipation. This helps maintain well-being and quality of life, and can also improve difficult behaviors related to dementia.

The trouble is that constipation is often either overlooked or sub-optimally managed by busy healthcare providers who aren’t trained in geriatrics. They are often focused on more “serious” health issues. Also, since many laxatives are available over-the-counter, some providers may assume that people will treat themselves if necessary.

Personally, I don’t like this hands-off approach to constipation. Although several useful laxatives are indeed available over-the-counter (OTC), I’ve found that the average person doesn’t know enough to correctly choose among them.

Also, although in geriatrics we often do end up recommending or prescribing laxatives, it’s vital to start by figuring out what is likely to be causing — or worsening — an older person’s constipation.

For instance, many medications can make constipation worse, so we usually make an attempt to identify and perhaps deprescribe those.

In short, if you’re an older adult, or if you’re helping an older loved one with health issues, it’s worthwhile to learn the basics of how constipation should be evaluated and managed. This way, you’ll be better equipped to get help from your health providers, and if it seems advisable, choose among OTC laxative options.

Here’s what I’ll cover in this article: [Read more…]

Depression in Aging:
Diagnosis & Treatment When the Golden Years are Blue

by Nicole Didyk, MD 15 Comments

Most of us can relate to feeling sad or blue, sometimes for days at a time. It may be in response to a major life event like losing a job, a break-up, or as part of grief. These sad feelings can lead us to feel less interested in enjoyable activities, make us lose our appetite or disrupt sleep.

Although research shows that people often become happier as they age, sad feelings are also very natural and can be associated with some of the typical transitions and changes of aging. But depression, from a medical point of view, is something different, and should not be considered a normal part of getting older.

In this article, I’ll explain the most important things to know about late-life depression, including:

What’s different about depression in later life?
How is depression diagnosed (especially in an older person who may also have medical illnesses that can mimic depression symptoms)?
What treatments are recommended for older adults with depression?
What you can do if you’re worried that someone is depressed.

In an upcoming article, I’ll also cover the special considerations and challenges when it comes to diagnosing and treating depression in those living with dementia, which is a common scenario in my practice as a geriatrician.

Depression in Later Life

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Q&A: What to Do About Unintentional Weight Loss

by Leslie Kernisan, MD MPH 115 Comments

Q: My 88-year-old father lives in his own home about 100 miles from us. He’s been living alone since my mother died five years ago. I thought he looked rather thin last time we saw him. I’m starting to feel worried about his nutrition. Should I be concerned? Would you recommend he start drinking a supplement such as Boost or Ensure?

A: This question comes up a lot for families. It is indeed very common for older adults to experience unintentional weight loss at some point in late life.

The brief answer is that yes, you should be concerned. But I wouldn’t recommend you jump to purchasing Boost or Ensure.

Now, in most cases, some nutritional supplementation is in order. But before focusing on this, you should first get help figuring out why your father is losing weight.

For doctors, unintended weight loss is a major red flag when it comes to the health of an older person.

So in geriatrics, we usually recommend that an older person — or their caregivers — monitor weight regularly. This enables us to spot weight loss sooner rather than later.

Once we’ve spotted unintentional weight loss, the next step is to figure out what might be causing it. And then we’re in a better position to recommend a treatment plan, which might well include a nutritional supplement.

In this post, I’ll go over each of these steps in more detail.